My 5 dark thoughts

Thought number 1 and also my unpopular opinion is that it’s not fair that football players earn millions while there are people starving on the street right now. It’s something sad, not something to be celebrated. Is something to be angry about. I understand the government needs to distract people somehow so that they don’t complain about the fact that the society is being poorly managed and the resources poorly administrated, I also understand that football is a way to support capitalism and everything that it represents, as it moves billions and helps maintan the status quo, I understand we need to be entertained and distracted, because we are stupid and gullible, but still I can’t wrap my head around the fact that our society idolizes football players with all their violent behaviour, theatrical diving, faking, exaggerating and always trying to get an unfair advantage over the other players, while the real heroes like the teachers, doctors, scientist and people who actually contribute in some way to society are underpaid, overworked and overlooked. And even though I grew up in Argentina, I am probably the only Argentinian person who thinks there is something very wrong with Mr. Messi earning 3 million Euros a month while people in Buenos Aires, Rosario, Cordoba, Salta, Jujuy, Misiones, and many parts of Argentina are living in the street and have no food to eat.
Thought number 2 comes due to the fact that I will cross the Ecuador/Colombian border tomorrow and the fear of the unknown creeps in. Because going to a new country for the first time is always scary, especially in South America where many people have guns and are crazy. And I know I’m also crazy and I grew up in the murder capital of Argentina (Rosario). I always get the feeling everyone around me is not living in the moment but they act out of habit. And whenever I think of the unknown I ask myself, what is life? why are we living? is life worth living? am I different or the same as everyone else? Fear leads me to question myself and my life, and that’s scary.
Thought number 3 comes from seeing the people wait in line for 8 to 10 hours to get a stamp when they cross the Colombian border into Ecuador or vice-versa, with babies, and lots of bags. I can’t help but think that the whole process should be automated with machines on the border or it should be done online in 5 minutes, but of course, it’s also my unpopular opinion to think we should use technology to make people’s life easier and not otherwise.
Thought number 4 appears everytime someone asks me for money, especially on the street or when we are having a meal at a restaurant. At least every day someone will ask me for money here in Colombia and they look at you deep in the eyes and you say no 10 times and they keep pushing and pushing, they don’t give up easily, and I try to be polite and say I don’t have, but the truth is that I hate them for making me feel that way, because the only reason they ask me is because I am a foreigner and they think foreigners have money but the truth is I have like 500 dollars in my bank account and then that’s it. Everyone else around me has way more money than me, they have cars, houses, savings, families who support them, etc. I have met thousands of people during my trips but no one as poor as me. And I know I shouldn’t hate them for judging a book by its cover, but it’s not only that, I hate them for asking other people for money, because I think the government is the one who should be looking after people and I don’t think people should be ok with the fact that the government is not providing them with food and shelter and health care and education, I think they should be angry and start a revolution. There are hundreds of people living in the streets of Bogota and none of them are mad at the government for it, they are robbing and killing civilians instead. They think it’s better to rob and kill other poor people instead of taking it with the ones who are responsible for their misery, they will get on the busses with guns and knives and rob the passengers of the bus who are also poor people who are just going to work, going to work for pennies, because people here earn 1usd an hour and still they have to deal with the homeless coming into the bus with knives to kill them, and all because the government is not doing their job properly, and instead of complaining people will watch football or some silly thing and I’m very mad about it.
Thought number 5 is a compilation of the previous thoughts plus the fact that our life is no different than that of an animal of a plant in the sense that our lives are short and we are doing the best we can to thrive in our environment. So it probably doesn’t matter if people are smart or stupid, if they watch football or read a book, if they are rich or poor, if they kill or get killed, that’s life, that’s nature. It’s all the same in the end because we will all die a meaningless death. And that leads me to think it’s also ok for the government not to do their job properly, it’s ok that they pollute the air and the oceans, it’s ok that they torture, abuse and slaughter 56 billion farm animals every year for food when they know we could all be much happier and healthier eating vegetarian food, and I think it’s ok that in the US alone there are 5 empty houses for every homeless person, so every homeless could have 5 houses. People are exploited and abused everywhere I look because life is no more than a collection of systems designed to exploit one group of people or another. And even though they had the intellect and the means and resources to solve all the problems of the world a while ago, they probably also know that they will die in the end no matter what they do. If they are homeless living in the street or if they are the ones responsible for the misfortune of others, in the end, it won’t matter, so there’s no point doing anything or worrying about anything. And that’s what keeps me going, the fact that my existence is meaningless and that there’s nothing I could do change anything.

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